The L-Space Web: Filks

Don't call him Monkeyman


From: Daibhid Cheinnedelh
Newsgroups: alt.fan.pratchett
Subject: [I] The aforementioned filks (Was: [M](I think) Filk query)
Date: Wed, 12 Apr 2000 14:53:51 GMT

Finally, while the trend seems to have moved to S&G, I assume there is still a market for Chris de Burgh filk?

Don't call him Monkeyman

It was half past ten in the Mended Drum, when in came a man on the run
A lifetime spent in Lancre before this journey
He is still unused to the city ways, different from the map in his mind
But isn't that a chimp with a pint of best bitter?

But when he said "That's a mo...", the regulars howled
There were voices 'cross the bar (Don't say it)
Voices from afar (Don't say it)
That ape's got no sense of humour...

Whatever you do:
Don't call him monkeyman!
Don't try to pick a fight!
Don't call him monkeyman
Or you won't get out of here alive

He goes to the bar, and orders a beer, feeling danger down his back
Beware that old anthropoid in the corner
And then the beer arrived and he drank it down
And it gave his system quite a shock
And he saw some bugs that jabbered and moaned in the tankard

Then the pub joker cries "You're a man with good eyes
"So name that animal" (Don't say it)
"Name that animal" (Don't say it)
"One word, six letters, starts with 'M'"

Whatever you do:
Don't call him monkeyman!
Don't try to pick a fight!
Don't call him monkeyman
Or you won't get out of here alive

This is becoming a sickness! I now find it difficult to listen to a song without filking it. I've already got the basics of the Patrician's "I Have A Scheme" worked out. Expect it on my next visit.

Dave, who will return


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