From: "Daibhid Cheinnedelh" Newsgroups: alt.fan.pratchett,alt.books,pratchett Subject: [I] Filks and Farewell Date: Sat, 27 Nov 1999 19:41:25 GMT Hi, this is probably going to be my last post for a while, as I my University career didn't turn out quite like I hoped, and I will be returning to Inverness soon B-(. There's apparently a new cybercafe opening up, and my Mum's trying to get us online, so I will return when you least expect it B-). In the meantime, here's a couple more filks: Rincewind won’t be a hero (with apologies to Bo Donaldson and The Heywoods) The albatross came to Ankh Morpork A Great Wizard trying to find The Faculty consulted, and summoned Rincewind Trying to leave adventure far behind He was sent to the Empire To help the rebels in some way And there he met Pretty Butterfly And in his fear he tried to say Rincewind won’t be a hero, he’s too much care for his life! Rincewind won’t be a hero, he’s scared of swords, bows and knives! But when he tried to say no, She said You’ve no choice but to go-o-oh! Rincewind, you’ll be a hero, take it from me. The wizard hid out on a hillside The battle raging all around He knew he had to hang on here On this nice, safe piece of ground Then he fell down a tunnel And found the terracotta golems And he found himself back in the mellee Remindin’ himself of what he said He said: Rincewind won’t be a hero, he’s too much care for his life! Rincewind won’t be a hero, he’s scared of swords, bows and knives! But when he tries to say no, He finds he’s no choice but to go-o-oh! Rincewind, you'll be a hero, just wait and see! Woh-oh-oh-oh, Rincewind you’ll be a hero, ask the Lady. I heard that Rincewind was in XXXX Following his feat that day Scrappy told him he could be a hero For Truth, Justice and the Ecksian Way I heard that Rincewind ran away Walk of Death (with apologies to Dire Straits) Here comes the reaper on his horse named Binky Talking in his trademarked hollow caps Hear comes the reaper with his scythe and hourglass Down in the domain where time don’t elapse He’s got the action, he’s got the motion Yeah, he’s got the scythe. Dedication to the Duty, Severing the thread at the end of the life He’s the final cure for hunger, He lets the terminal rest, He do the walk, he do the walk of Death Here comes the reaper, don’t believe the story He’s efficient, but he’s not cruel Here comes the reaper, he don’t believe in glory He’s just got a job to do He’s got the action, he’s got the motion Yeah, he’s got the scythe. Dedication to the Duty, Severing the thread at the end of the life He’s the final cure for hunger, He lets the terminal rest, He do the walk, he do the walk of Death Here comes the reaper on his horse named Binky Talking in his trademarked hollow caps Hear comes the reaper with his scythe and hourglass Down in the domain where time don’t elapse He’s got the action, he’s got the motion Yeah, he’s got the scythe. Dedication to the Duty, Severing the thread at the end of the life And after all the violence and faltalities He'll be waiting for your final breath You do the walk, you do the walk of Death And finally, one I wrote just now in the microlab, to try and convey how important afp has been, along with EU Skiffeysoc, during the rather difficult last two months: Afp (with apologies to Lennon/McCartney, natch) When I found myself in times of trouble I needed somewhere I could be Discussing works of Pratchett Afp For when I'm feeling tense and angry I can calm down with a PC Discussing works of Pratchett Afp Afp, afp, afp, afp Discussing works of Pratchett Afp I leave another pointless meeting With the science faculty I need to find some humour Afp I'd go stark staring bonkers Leaving University I need sympathy and humour Afp Afp, afp, afp, afp Discussing works of Pratchett Afp And though I may be leaving There is still a chance that I will be Posting on this newsgroup Afp For though netcafes are pricey They are still cheaper than therapy The calming threads of the newsgroup Afp Afp, afp, afp, afp Discussing works of Pratchett Afp And, um, I suppose that's it. Sniff. I hate long goodbyes. See you all sometime. -- Dave, the last post Libroid of EU Skiffysoc http://www.ed.ac.uk/~sesoc "Happy holidays, Bruce." "Crime never takes a holiday, Clark."